Wednesday, June 17, 2009

With love

College days!! The time of your life when the world is your oyster. The possibilities - endless, the future- brilliant, the experiences- intense, the friends -forever; or so it seems. The time when friends were more important than family, when love seemed to make the world go round. It did not matter where the love was; in books, in movies, between the class Romeo and Juliet (every class had at least one couple who mooned over each other ), on TV - wherever. We read about it, watched it , discussed it and dreamed about it. We also sent it in every missive we ever put our names to. The letters were signed off 'with love', the greetings had 'lots and lots of love' - in fact, nothing ever went anywhere without that little four letter word.

Even today, I find that no one uses the word more generously than the young. 'loved the movie, love your dress, love ice-cream,love the Beatles....' Maybe, with youth,what's not to love?

Remember the letter you wrote someone you met in the summer holidays and promised eternal friendship? It was most likely signed with lots of love. As we grew older we lost touch with that friend and also with the word 'love'. Maybe, we discovered that love was too precious to be bandied around. It involved making a lifetime commitment to one person. At times it involved going through a difficult pregnancy and painful labour. Very often, it meant sleepless nights with a sick child or an unwell parent. It could be the serious job applications, that had no place for any emotion, that distanced us from that word. What ever the reason, we signed our letters and mail with regards, affection, with sincerity and even smiley faces!

Recently, I was in touch with a lady in connection with a story I was writing, and she replied to my regards with love and a footnote that said 'The world needs it'. Couldn't argue with that and yet I still hesitate to sign off with love. I have noticed that with age, we are not so free with the word, as we used to be. Age makes us more reserved, more cynical, less open to possibilities, fearful of rejection and loss and less forgiving. So maybe, the best time to send the word (and mean it) around, is all the time. Let age/maturity not inhibit us in these times of rage and race, polarisation and globalisation. Are we brave enough?


  1. a very well written piece - made a lot of sense. i always still sigh my emails and text msgs with "lots of love". maybe i still havent grown up in the world's sense of the word. mayve its best i dont.
    love supriya bose

  2. thanks priya. glad you still do... who kknows, maybe we can win the battle one-by -one... love...suchismita

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  4. I had stopped signing off 'with love' for many years. I had lost the ability to 'just love'. I became judgemental and kunjoos with my love - only these few and to hell with the rest. But recently the feeling of loving all started creeping in and I started signing off 'with love' just to get the feeling to enlarge and envelope myself and everyone and everything within its warm embrace...It's working!


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